Heads I win, Tails you lose

Glass jar with lid gets me slapped — twice

I must have been around six or seven, I think. All of us in the family were sitting for dinner and we had just begun. My mom asked me to pass the ghee (clarified butter) that was in a glass jar. Even as I lifted it, the glass jar slipped and shattered to pieces on the hard granite floor — even as I was left holding the lid securely in my hand.

The next thing I realized was the clatter of my jaw bones from a slap that came like lightning from my dad. It was so fast that I could not even see his backstroke — he did not give me time to brace myself.

He lifted his index finger and said — “Never lift a glass jar by the lid”.

The slap was hard and the lesson learnt for my lifetime — I have never done it again — whether it is glass or not.

Fast forward a few months. My dad was in a rush to get to office and I was getting ready for school. He had the habit of applying coconut oil to his bald pate every morning — I never understood why he did that considering that he was almost totally bald. And yes, the coconut oil was in a glass jar. Again yes, he lifted it by the lid — the glass jar slipped and shattered to pieces on the hard granite floor — even as he was holding the lid securely in his hand.

I don’t think I recalled the earlier incident but definitely looked up at him and what came next was even more unanticipated than earlier. This time the forehand slap was harder and faster. I was bewildered.

He lifted his index finger and said — “always close the lid properly”.

I don’t think I was the one who left the lid like that but I had no right to protest and I never did.

Neither have I forgotten the incidents nor the lessons but what I distinctly remember is that double standards are something that I need to get used to. Of course, I never could forget the sharpness of the slaps.

Now, years and years later, I am myself a father and as I recall — it helps me question myself, more than the glass jars and the slaps. Thanks, Dad, for that.